02 június, 2013

Namaste Everyone!

I’m already on my way home it’s funny because my plane left from Kathmandu at 16.25 and I suppose to arrive to Budapest at 16.25 next day local time. J As it was quite predictable I didn’t have time in the last days to post on the blog, but here it comes now.

So at the end I’ve spent 2,5 weeks in Kathmandu ashram. After a touching goodbye from Terai children I enjoyed the company of the people in Kathmandu, children and elders as well.

/zöldségek a piacon/

On the weekend I went to the market to sell some organic vegetables, grains and milk products. Though the business doesn’t go too well nowadays we had great time. Usually during the day everyone is busy with all kinds of works, but on the market I could talk with the girls. One of them just visited her homevillage for the first time since she left it as a child many years ago. And she had really a great time there. The villagers were very welcoming everyone came to visit so she had a very nice time. She was not the only one who went home for a visit, and their reactions were the same, they came back very happily filled up with great experiences from the warm welcome and love what they received in their villages.


 On the weekdays in the morning I was mostly helping out in the garden having a great time with the people in the meanwhile. We were picking carrots, taking out the bad weed, planting chilly, etc. The taking out the bad plants and arranging the good ones was a task like a Piéron attention test. Because there were 2 types of plants that had to stay in the ground, one good vegetable what we needed to take out and collect it and the other bad weed had to be taken out too. So I really needed to pay attention take it out or not, if yes where to put. So yes you can get mentally tired while working in the garden! J But I enjoyed it.


School

On the afternoons I was teaching in the school here. On the first week I had all the 5 classes (one-two-three-seven-eight). Class three was great there were only 5 children and they were eager to learn English from me, we really became close in these 2,5 weeks, in the last 3-4 days they came every day to visit me in my room when they had some freetime. Class two and one were a lot more challenging. In class two there are 12 students and they are quite lively and they don’t really understand English so it was difficult to explain them what I want to do, even when I wanted to play, nobody seemed to pay attention and understand. Almost every day there was a small fight between them. So the first week started like that, but by the second week I managed to find a way to teach them too. Class one I gave up, with them I really couldn’t do anything they did whatever they wanted, so for 2 days I played with them, but then I gave back the class to the boy who originally had them, because when some conflicts came up between the kids during lesson I was helpless, because I didn’t understand the problem. I really enjoyed “teaching” class seven. I have to admit I didn’t really teach them in the conservative meaning of the word. Because I was just having casual conversation with them about how they like their days here and about what’s going on in Terai without them. I really like them, they are a very good class, with lot’s of nice children. I mean all children are nice, but for some reason I feel especially attached to class seven… Class eight were nice too, them I didn’t know before so I was only talking with them too, or helping with their maths homework. J They are very nice people too, so it’s a pity that I haven’t spend more time with them. But after the first week I chose to teach English only in class three and two. And in the afternoon I was teaching them how to make bracelets from threads. J

/making bracelets

They enjoyed braceletmaking a loooot. Really every day there were around 15 of them coming, asking me for threads or help to start or to learn a new way of making it. There were 2-3 children who learned it quickly and even invented new styles. J So it was a very successful project. Now I have 14 bracelets on my left hand and one on my right. I got many presents. J


I hope it will stay a good memory for them. Two elder boys who are in their twenties now told me that around 8-9 years ago there was a tourist here from America who taught them the same and they still remember. They still have it as a great memory. So I hope some of these children will also remember after 8-9 years that we made bracelets together. Though I hope to be back before!
/cleaning the cow's place in the afternoon/

In the evening I helped with chapatti as usual. J Though in the last few days I had to prepare my goodbye presents for here too, and the constant presence of the children in my room (what I enjoyed very much) made it difficult. They came to make more bracelets. And I’ve also taught them how to draw in paint on the computer, they enjoyed it a loooooot, that you can change colours with one click try out different versions before deciding. J I think a 10 year old average child from my country would not be fascinated by paint. Though I’m sure in the rural area the reaction would be the same.
/Learning something new/

We had two special days when we were concreting the roof of the main kitchen building and the school building. Those were hardworking days, many outside workers came too to help and everyone was busy from the ashram too. 

/the new roof/


The workers were wearing plasticbags over their clothes and on their feet to protect it from the cement, because it opens up the small wounds on your skin. (I went up to the roof on barefoot, it was not a good idea). I havent’t been on a construction site lately, I have some foggy memories about my grandparents renewing their house, but I think it was around 12-13 years ago. 

/having a little break and drinking curd/

When we were doing the roof of the school we had to carry up the stones in bags and baskets because the material by the school  was over before they could finish the top. So everyone took a sack or a basket and we were going in line like ants. Even the small ones joined the work, carrying one spadeful of stones. I had a great fun with them, competing who goes faster, singing Hungarian children’s song for them. They were racing who can hold my hand on the way down. J And we started to call each other boyni/bhai and didi, so brothers and sisters. 


 

 /carrying stones/

And I really felt like that. The older ones who go to outside school class nine and then joined the line after school. It’s so unbelievable, they have some days when there is 12 hours of school for them… Who can concentrate for 12 hours? And after they arrive home, they join the work… Hardworking people really. I hope I can take this habit with me so I will spend my days in a useful way in my country too.


 /The ashram and the valley behind/

It’s really amazing that all of this, the ashram started 20 years ago. It’s visible how much hard work, they have put into it. And they always continue to develop. They bought a new land in the hilly region, so in the future there will be a third branch there, they will start the work next month by flattening the land. If I would still be here for a few months I would have loved to go and see how they put down the foundation of a new place. But I’m already on the way home. Next time I come there might even be some house to stay in there. J

/ going on a little excursion/

It really wasn’t easy to leave. I spent more than 24 hours at the end with goodbyes, because I didn’t want to miss anyone. It was sometimes with tears rolling down on my cheeks, sometimes with a wide smile. The day before yesterday with four girls I had a little goodbye walk in the forest, it was fun! JAnd on my last night, they helped me to put on a sari, their traditional cloth, so I could see how would I look like. J They even put black hair on me, so I can look perfectly nepali. Well for me the result is quite unusual. J The eastern way of goodbyes contains way less hugging then what I would have genuinely done. I wanted to hug and kiss all the children, but I didn’t. But I’ve got some warm hugs from the elders that comforted me. 
/having some fun last night in a sari/

From the children I’ve got so many drawings and letters. I’ve already some of it, it’s very sweet. The letters of some elder ones really made me feel great and touched and emotional. And they made me a “kurta” a kind of blouse what they are always wearing. It is beautiful. I’m wearing it now. J I know that my time here was lifechanging for me and I got to know so many wonderful people, and when I realize that it’s not only them who became important for me but they also feel the same way it does break my heart a bit. But I’m gonna be fine, because they are gonna be fine to. And we will see each other again. Not with everyone I guess, but I hope with a lot of them… It's not an "us" anymore….

 /I also prepared some colourful letters/

There might be certain things I’m changed in. The first new thing right now, is that I’m unusually calm. Really. I used to be worrying a lot when it comes to flights, about unnecessary things on what I have no influence, but still it worries me. But not now. Now I’m calm and just going with it. Its new, but a great feeling, peaceful. Am I gonna be like this from now on? I like it! J

And probably my first reaction when meeting with someone will be joining my hands in front of my chest not straightening my right arm for a handshake. I might be surprised to find hot water in the tap when I want to take a shower. And I would feel lucky to find electricity whenever I need it.  Not to mention how glad I am that we have a washing machine and I don’t have to wash everything with my hands anymore.  If someone asks me to draw a flower I will not draw the usual margarita what I used to but more something lotuslike. JMaybe I’m gonna eat rice every day now or if not then maybe I will miss it, and the green things what we were eating and I will miss the spicy food. Though I was not using my hands for eating I will definitely miss the freedom of eating habits. I might pour over my soup on the rice at the dining hall by habit, I’m not used to eat rice plain just like rice, I liked to pour the dhal all over it…. And probably I’m gonna sit on the floor much more often than before. I would pay attention not to go in front of someone when he or she in eating on the floor but go behind, but I’m not sure I’m gonna meet with this situation. If I would own a driving license I’m sure I would use the horn way too many times compared to my culture. Ohh and I’m gonna miss the cows from the city, who were calmly wandering around and everyone was letting them be. But the littering habit I could not get used to it. That when you finish something you just throw the wrapping on the ground, even after 5 months I still put it in my pocket until I find a garbage bin, so that habit of mine fortunately could not change. I might go to bed early and wake up around 5 every morning. But I’m afraid I will go back to my old habits with staying up late and getting up late, but I’ll see.

Now my sense of time is really disturbed. I tried to sleep a few hours I managed to sleep around 4-5 in small 20-30 minutes parts. I was wondering around at the airport in New-Delhi. It’s very big and new and nice. Mostly I did window-shopping only, and I ate dinner (chicken after 5 month of vegetarian life) and a mango-sorbet ice-cream from Haagen-dazs. I know it’s luxury, but I haven’t had ice cream in Nepal and I missed the mango season I left too early so I just went for it.

Now I still have around 3,5 hours until boarding time. And there is no internet access available on the airport unless I have an Indian mobile number, which is not a good system I think. But I hope I can upload this from Munich.  There are already some travel companions where I’ve been what have I done in Nepal for five months. And I talk about it, but the realization still didn’t come that it is over, I’m not gonna see these people for quite some time now. Even Ama (grandma) said to me with concern and care in her eyes to earn money and come back as soon as I can. So yes I’m attached to from the four year old little ones until the seventysomething elder ones with all the agegroups in between, they are my second family. And I hope to return to them again.
 
/Good-bye Nepal!/

Thank you for reading me. This experience was wonderful for me and I’m sure on paper is not as good as living it. So you should come to Nepal and discover it yourself, it’s a beautiful country with beautiful people.
My nepali days are over. But here comes the question do you want me to write more about my time here? I mean I spent my 146 days in Nepal, but I could not update very regularly. And I did write a journal for myself every day.And if you would be interested to read more I will figure out a way to share it with you.

This is my first time writing a blog. So if you’ve read me regularly and followed my days or if you’ve just popped by now to check it it doesn’t matter please leave a short comment on how you like it. So I know your opinions. J Thank you.

All right. So I’m gonna come with an extra post about my trekking soon. But in a way this is the end. I’m really grateful for everyone who helped me to make this journey. And I’m grateful for everyone with whom I met during this journey. I’m full with happiness and with many-many great memories.

Good-bye! Namaste!
Eszter=Tara

PS.: I’ve been listening music a lot lately. And there are some great lines that helps me to describe how do I feel. J

I don’t know why but I can’t seem to find the right melody today. I can’t make the words fit how I feel. (Skye Stop complaining)
Remember those walls I build, they are trembling down And they didn’t even put up a fight, they didn’t even make a sound…. It’s like I’ve been awakened. (Beyonce Halo)
Here I am, this is me there is nowhere else on Earth I’d rather be… It’s a new world it’s been a new start. It’s alive with the beating of the young hearts. It’s a new day, it’s a new plan. (Bryan Adams Here I am)
Hold on hold on my brother, my sister hold on tight. I finally got my orders. I’ll be marching through the morning, marching through the night, moving cross the borders of My Secret Life. (Leonard Cohen In My Secret Life)
And in the air the fireflies our only light in the paradise. We will show the world they were wrong, and teach them to sing along. If everyone cared nobody cried if everyone loved nobody lied if everyone shared and swallowed their pride… Imagine what the world could be. (Nickelback If everyone cared)
And it’s over, I’m going under. I’m not giving up, I’m just giving in. Never let me go, never let me go. (Florence and the machine Never let me go)
Pushing pushing pulling moving on. A sense of freedom we’ve been hanging on. I’ve cut the chord and now it won’t be long… (Matt Cardle Starlight)
Where do I go from here. I’m so lost. Do you know how hard it is? … Looking through my gallery drowning in my memories… Never felt like this in my life. (Mclean Broken)
I was kissed by a gentler wind than given back my breath… I’m flying over the misery and all that it could bring…. a forest filled with laughter filled with songs from every tree. This new season is forever. Bud and sprout beyond belief.  (Ayo Believe)
Hold up, hold on, don’t be scared, You’ll never change what’s been and gone. May you smile… Shine on… Don’t be scared, Your destiny may keep you warm… Just try not to worry, You’ll see them some day. Take what you need, and be on your way. (Leona Lewis Stop crying your heart out)
My heart told my head let love grow, but my head told my heart this time no this time no. (Mumford and Sons Winter Winds)
At night I fell asleep with visions of myself dancing and laughing and crying with them. I believe in the person I want to become. I believe in the freedom of the open rode… I believe in the kindness of the strangers. … I am free. (Lana Del Rey Ride monologue)